Sneakoscopes
Sneakoscopes helps you look into the future. What lies ahead? Make sure you stay up to date on the latest!
By February Fortescue
Welcome to the new (but definitely not) improved SNEAKOSCOPES, where I, fortune teller February Fortescue, shall sneak a peak and scope out your future!
The honourable Prof. Sindor Aloyarc has kindly lent this treasure to me, so I shall be passing on my wondrous visions to each of you. If you are a first time visitor, please read Sin's The HOL Zodiac article. This is such a bewitchingly magical time of year! I'm certain each of you flew during that lunar eclipse, right? No magical folk in their right mind would have missed that one! Several of you were spotted, BTW - the Obliviators spent hours listening to muggle children describing witches on broomsticks flying across the moon! Merlin's Moustache, what were you thinking? Ah, but a lunar eclipse means even more than you could ever dream of! The Moon represents changes and emotions, and a lunar eclipse is three times more powerful than just a regular full moon. And as any werewolf can tell you, a full moon is something to howl at!! Big, big changes are coming up for each of you. For more specifics, find your sign, and I shall reveal what I see. SATYR (December 22 — January 19) Wanting to catch the attention of that Satyr you have your eyes on? Now's the time! Poof your Amortentia Potion into the ether, because this sign is looking for love! Satyrs, you are guaranteed to find that special being during this eclipse or soon afterwards. Already found that someone? Pull out those Celestina Warbeck records, because your romance is about to incendio to all new heights of love! I’ll ask Madam Puddifoot to save you a table. HARPY (January 20 — February 18) Get ready to feel all the feels, Harpy. I see big changes coming with your home, whether you live in a manor like the Malfoys or a delightful hodgepodge like the Weasleys. Gather your galleons and redecorate, or sell and scale up – bigger can be better, you know! And give in to your inner Luna and go ahead and hang those scales on the walls. Why does it always have to be shells? <<<wink>>> RAMORA (February 19 — March 20) Take advantage of your charisma, Ramora! People are going to be drawn to the exchange of ideas and thoughts. I can even see a foray into education for you! Ron Weasleys of the world, now is the perfect time to give in to that attraction to the intellect and fill your brain with all the studying you can stand! You professors, such as my colleague, Prof. Trelawney, will no doubt be flooing to the nearest wizarding conference. See you at “Choosing your Crystal Colors,” Sybill! WYVERN (March 21 — April 19) Galleons and loads of them are coming your way, Wyvern! So many galleons that you can expect a certain set of goblins to know you by name! Something magical is going to affect your income stream, so look for a change in career (maybe write for the HOwLer?) or even go for Head of WIZENGAMOT! Surrender to the boldness and your fortunes will rise faster than a Hungarian Horntail! MINOTAUR (April 20 — May 20) It's time for you to release the past and embrace the future, gentle Minotaur. Get your face out of the Pensieve and look around at all the beauties that live outside of the greenhouse. All endings mean a new beginning. The blooms are fading away but they will return. Where would you like your life to go? Maybe give Potions a try? Or ask that intriguing Satyr? DOPPLEGANGER (May 21 — June 20) Heads up! You've been spotted, Doppleganger! That sneaky side that's been up to no good running around with that Marauder's Map has caught the attention of the some of the more rule following wizarding folk and they're about to turn you in. Expect your karma to kick you in the butt. In the meanwhile, if you have some dark objects to unload for some inexpensive knuts, give Feb Fortescue a floo call. I may know someone. SIREN (June 21 — July 22) Friendships are in your future! People will be drawn to your Dobby-like love and compassion, so now is the time to excel on those bonding and people skills! You do warmth and cozy so well, Siren, so perhaps charm a beautiful meal with butterbeer on tap, incendio a fire in the fireplace and invite everyone you've always wanted to be friends with. Cheers! CHIMERA (July 23 — August 22) Love recognition, right, Chimera? Great news! Your drive to be front and center of the pack will be met in lordly leaps and bounds! Dance away like a Hippogriff and everyone will follow your steps! You're the bravest of us all, so Liquid Luck is needed for you, especially not now when you open that special joke shop, or gain victory over that Erumpent in your life. BANSHEE (August 23 — September 22) Travel time! Yes, I know, not something you think of very often, but it's calling to you right now like a Fwooper, isn't it? Stop silencing that bird, Banshee, grab that broom or floo powder, and go! Haven't you secretly wanted to check out that Yeti Reserve in the Himalayas? There's a sale on Year with the Yeti at Flourish and Blotts – just tell them Feb Fortescue sent you for an additional 10 knuts off. LYCAN (September 23 — October 22) Oh, my, Lycan, an inheritance or a settlement is in your future! I wonder what it could be? Maybe it's land to grow much needed herbs and plants? May I recommend Lavender? You'd make a fine fortune selling this beauty! Everyone has those occasional sleepless nights and Lavender is a must have for both Calming Draught and Sleeping Draught! Or maybe you'll inherit a collection of rubber ducks? You can dress those up to appear as all sort of interesting people, such as Artur Weasley if you add red hair (I bet I know someone who would buy one), or you could even add feathers and sell them as toy Phoenix' at Weasley's Wizard Wheezes! Just don't let them catch on fire. Burning rubber doesn't have the most pleasant smell. ASWANG (October 23 — November 21) So, Aswang, I see you're looking for a partner. Not romance necessarily, but more in line with business, or perhaps even a goblin to help with finances. You tend to be the secretive sort, but now is not the time! Advertize in the HOwLer: 'Goblin needed for Galleon counting! Wonderfully rich witch needs help keeping up with all that money!' Or maybe it's a business partner? 'Interviewing Witches and Wizards for position as assistant for secret job. Successful candidate will need to be able to disappear for a year. Contact WL for details.' THESTRAL (November 22 — December 21) It's time for a change, Thestral! I see a fitter you in your future. I know how you love to travel, but this time, your new adventures may involve taking that new warming charm, enveloping it around your body on cold mornings, and jogging around the Black lake. I've heard Centaurs love the chase, so before long, you'll have new jogging partners following behind! Don't like this idea? Well, I've heard the Merpeople are developing a new fitness routine which may be of benefit to wizarding folk everywhere. Don't forget the Gillyweed! |